


Nightmares, Teddy Bears and Feels

by InnocencePoisoned



Series: Nessian- Teddy Bear Files [1]
Category: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Breakfast in Bed, F/M, Fluff, Light Angst, Literal Sleeping Together, Sleeping Together, Swearing, Totally friendly way, Wings, Wingspan jokes, Written Pre-ACoWaR, bad language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-01
Updated: 2017-12-01
Packaged: 2018-09-03 10:55:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8709715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InnocencePoisoned/pseuds/InnocencePoisoned
Summary: Nesta is having nightmares and decides that sleeping with Cassian (literal sleeping) will help chase them away. It works but comes with unexpected feelings and awkwardness.Alternatively,“I know of a way that should work. But you won't like it.”“I'll do anything.”“Sleep with Cassian.”“Except that. What the fuck, Azriel?”**NEW CHAPTER ADDED**





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I wanted some fluffy- angsty stuff for one of my favourite ships and now almost ten thousand words later I realise I'm one for those slow burns. (Help I tried doing a short one-shot but it got out of hand so I stopped before I reached the 20k mark.)
> 
> Also I have a headcanon that of course Nesta would treasure anything that Elain got her so a dark teddy was born into the mix.
> 
> Enjoy!

She was strong, damnit. She was a strong, powerful woman who didn't let the world get to her.

But the dark water was surrounding her, closing in and suffocating all life that had existed within her.

She used to be strong. She used to be a strong, powerful woman who didn't let the world get to her. But ever since she had emerged from the dark depths of the Cauldron, she was a scarred and timid creature.

She never let it show of course. Nesta Acheron would never let the sleepless nights silently screaming in her bed show. Everyone at the house knew something was off, they weren't blind to the dark rings under her eyes or the exhaustion that tugged at her, but none of them ever questioned her too much about it.

All except one. Cassian.

He irked her. He had irked her before she was Made and now he irks her every time he gets the chance. Sometimes he doesn't even need to say anything to annoy her. Sometimes he just breathes annoyingly.

“What do you want?” she asked him flatly as he sat in front of her at the breakfast table with a smirk plastered on his face.

He shrugged. “Maybe I just wanted a front row seat to your eating habits,” his eyes flickered down to her near-empty plate. “or lack thereof.”

“I'll ask again. What. Do. You. Want.” she snapped. She had had another sleepless night thanks to those endless nightmares, and she was not in the mood to deal with the Illyrian commander.

His eyes dropped their usual amused look for a brief second. “Do you want to train with me?”

She wanted to say no, honestly. But she had been recommended training from sources now and she was already planning to ask Mor to help. Now she had a chance to let out all her frustrations on someone who frustrated her. Besides, it's not like she could ever hurt someone like him.

She placed the half eaten slice of bread back on the plate, already having lost the appetite for it. “When do we start?”

~o0o~

They started an hour later.

Cassian hadn't bothered to change from his usual household attire whilst Nesta had managed to fit in some leathers the wraiths had found somewhere. She had never understood her sister for preferring pants over dresses and skirts, but now, as her skin was peppered with sweat and heat, she fully knew.

Cassian hadn't made her do much already- just some basic warmups to get her looser- but the strain was wearing on her unused muscles more than she cared to admit.

“You have to keep your arms up and knees spread.” Cassian said again for the third time that morning. “Or you might just fall over before landing a blow.”

She growled at him, because she would never let him tell her how to better use her own limbs. She directed another punch to his gloved hands, not that it even did much. He didn't so much as blink at her attempts. That sparked a small flame of rage within her. How dare he be so strong and powerful while she struggled to walk for more than an hour at a time through the winding city streets.

Her next blow was harder, fuelled by that inking of rage. Still he did not react. Not so much as a twitch.

“Fuck you.” the words slipped off her tongue unbidden.

She knew the smirk would be on his lips- she didn't need to look up to know it. “Maybe when we're alone, sweetheart.”

She ignored that comment, and the many after that, and used the energy that usually went into making snappy resorts to strike him harder and harder.

And just when she was about to give up all hope and declare him an unbreakable wall of unflinching stone, he reacted.

It was a slight shifting of stance, barely noticeable, but she had seen it- and she let it spur on her next onslaught of punches which, she had been warned, would be much stronger than when she had still been mortal.

“Good work.” he said, quiet in comparison to the sound of her fists hitting worn and burnt leather.

She tried, honest to god tried, to ignore the fact that his praise had her feel a bit better about herself.

~o0o~  
That night was like all the others. She slipped into bed and slowly let sleep overtake her waiting form. And shortly after that, the nightmares began.

She was being grabbed again, held tight against the soldiers, while she watched helplessly as Elain was dunked into the gods forsaken Cauldron. She had never felt such pain as she had at that moment. Elain was the innocent one. She was the only one to bring flowers and life into her otherwise bleak life. She was the one to have cared so deeply and loved so freely when her other sisters could not.

Then Nesta was being brought forward. She was kicking, she was screaming, anything to stop what she would surely become to her if she was put inside of that thing.

Nesta woke up in her cold bed.

Sweat stuck hair to her forehead, tremors had her limbs shaking.

It wasn't real. She had lived through the nightmare and had come out stronger than ever before.

But why couldn't she stop thinking that maybe it would have been better to have died in that Cauldron?

~o0o~

Cassian knew those screams.

He knew what it was like to wake up covered in your own sweat and still having relived the nightmares of the past. He wished he could do more. He wished to walk to her room and tell her that he understood and that she wasn't alone.

But that wouldn't happen. Not with the walls she had erected around herself to keep the likes of him out.

~o0o~

The next few weeks went exactly the same way. Breakfast in the mornings, shortly followed by Nesta slowly learning how to protect herself physically. The afternoons usually consisted of her accompanying Elain down to the markets, or sitting by herself in one of the comfortable rooms with a book in hand. Evenings found her eating dinner outside in the gardens, since sitting indoors listening to them being a big happy family was enough to make her feel guilty for not having that.

This particular night Nesta was, as per usual, seated atop the balcony overlooking the city below. She had barely picked at her supper- as divine as it was- and now she was lounging on the iron bench. The wind had kicked up her hair from where she had delicately placed it that morning and sent it flying into her face.

“Having fun up here?” a voice said from behind her. She didn't even need to turn around to know who it was.

“What do you want, Cassian?” she said a sigh.

He walked over to the edge of the balcony, leaning forward on his elbows and gazing into the night beyond. “You know, maybe I like standing outside too.”

She rolled her eyes but said nothing more. Over the weeks of her training, they had grown a sort of comfortable companionship. That didn't mean to say that he had stopped irking her with his very existence, now she was just better at tolerating him.

He rolled his shoulders as another breeze kicked in and blew the dark hair from his shoulders. She loathed to admit it, but his hair was surprisingly well kept and probably smelt better than hers. Not that she would ever say that out loud.

His wings shifted behind him and the movement caught her eye. She had rarely seen him fly, the damage done to his wings on that fateful night had caused him to stay mostly grounded even when he was assured that they wouldn't break. She had never discussed it, but she had heard how much those wings had meant to him.

“They say,” she spoke- surprising even herself. “that an Illyrian's wingspan correlates with the size of certain other things.”

He turned to give her a grin over his shoulder. “Do they now?”

“I also heard that Azriel has the biggest wingspan.”

“You know, next time I'm bringing a ruler and we'll find out for sure.” he grumbled.

Despite herself, Nesta felt a tug at the corner of her lips. “Why, having confidence issues?”

He scoffed. “Ha! If anything, I think it's Az that has the issues. If I have to deal with one more sappy look he gives Mor...”

She had seen those looks herself and she had to agree. They again fell into that comfortable silence, the crickets below and the wind in the trees the only noise.

“You haven't been eating much.” he said, all too quiet for his usual tone.

Her eyes glanced at the uneaten food lying opposite her on the table. “I haven't been hungry.”

“Bull.” he snapped and she flinched back from sudden ferocity with which he spoke.

She narrowed her eyes and shot up from the bench in a fit. “What are you talking about?”

He turned on his heel and pointed at the food already grown cold. “Ever since Hybern I haven't seen you finish one single meal. Look at yourself, I haven't seen anyone that thin unless they were purposefully staving themselves.”

“And since when do you have any say in how much I eat?” now she was mad, and by the look on his face, so was he.

“That's not what I meant! We care about you, Nesta, and none of us want to see you starving!”

“I'm not starving, you brute. I'm just not hungry.”

“Really?” his voice turned cold and his eyes took on a glint that had another small part of her cowering. “Then I suppose you're also not having nightmares. That's just you waking up screaming just because you can.”

She refused to back down from him, even going as far as stepping up to poke him in the chest. “You have no business in what I do, Cassian.” she said in an icy tone. “And I suggest not criticising me when you won't even fly.”

She felt him tense and knew she would hit a nerve. “Yeah, I know all about how you used to brag and boast about flying, but not once have I seen you spreading those wings. So don't come to me telling me how I should eat more when you won't even do what you love most.”

His face was red with what she assumed was rage and she turned, thinking that she had finally made her point and that the argument was in her favour. But something stopped her before she could move even an inch away. The world was suddenly dark and warm, the sound of the crickets and the wind blocked out and the feeling of a warm breath on her neck. She tried blinking away the darkness and light started showing itself through a film- a membrane.

His wings.

“I don't want to fly.” Cassian said, his warm breath on her neck. “Because I'm afraid. I'm afraid that they won't work again and I'll just be falling. I'll be falling and my favourite things would have been taken away from me permanently.” 

His voice was wrecked, she realised. Like he was holding back from sobbing. It broke whatever restraints she had on her nightmare-scarred heart.

Nesta didn't know what she was doing, or how she was doing it, but before she knew what had happened to her restraints, she was hugging him. Her arms looped around his neck and her head buried in his chest. He was so much more fragile than she had ever expected, and he had probably never had many people to hold him. And she was sorry. She was so sorry for what she had said. She had never imagined that his wings meant that much to him.

“I'm also afraid.” she whispered against his shirt, not sure why she was going to tell him this. “I'm afraid that if I eat too much, the nightmares might make me throw it all up again.”

She felt a small sigh in his chest, followed by a shifting in his stance as he kept his hands by his sides. 

“It's called a hug, you tool. It's meant to be a two person participation thing.” she said, still holding on tight to his neck.

He chuckled, a rumbling feeling that made both their bodies move, and slowly had his arms around her shoulders too.

She didn't know how long they stood there, clinging tightly to each other while cocooned in the warm embrace of his wings. All she knew was that it was more comfortable than she had ever hoped for.

~o0o~

The nightmares still came to her that night. She didn't know why she expected otherwise.

She was watching, again and again, as Elain was shoved down into that vile Cauldron. Each time her screams got quieter and quieter, until all that was left of her loving sister was the flow of bubbles through that dark liquid.

Nesta knew what was coming next. The king said something, followed by her being dragged towards where her sister had not yet emerged. She was screaming again, at the king, at his men, at the uselessness that she could not help Elain.

Then she was awake. And clutching wildly at her ruined bedsheets. 

She couldn't stop. She couldn't stop these nightmares from happening. 

Nesta dragged her still sweat-wet form form her bed and padded from her room down the dark hallway to where she stood in front of of another door. She knocked, suddenly hoping that the occupant was asleep. When nothing happened for a few moments she realised how foolish she was, going to his room in the dead of night without reason.

So she turned from the door to walk back to her own room and pretend that this didn't happen. At least, she would have, if the door didn't open.

“Nesta?” Azriel asked, rubbing his eyes of sleep.

“I..” she cleared her throat and squared her shoulders. “I...” she didn't know why she was here.

“Do you need to talk?” he asked in that quiet voice of his.

She nodded, suddenly thankful that he could read people so easily. He moved and gave her space to walk inside. She stepped in and ignored the surprisingly colourful decorations of his room. She noted his perfectly made bed, but a blanket and pillow on the couch by the wall. He closed the door behind her.

She sat on the other couch, mindful of the papers littering the floor. He never struck her as a messy person. “I'm sorry to wake you up.” she started.

He made his way over to a table set up in the corner. Pouring himself a cup of what she supposed was tea, he offered her a cup but she declined. He seated himself on the couch opposite her, shifting the blanket away. He didn't say anything, just looked at her and raised his eyebrows.

“I'm sorry to wake you up,” she repeated. “I just... didn't know where else to go.”

“Not to Cassian?” he asked, still calmly sipping on his tea.

She shook her head. “I wanted to, at the beginning. But I don't want to dump my problems on top of all of his.”

“But you are okay with dumping them on me.” he stated.

She gave him wan smile. “You seem like a better listener.”

He nodded, and she took that as a sign to continue. “I've been having nightmares.” she stated. “And I know that everyone has nightmares but mine are always the same.” she didn't want to go into the details of her horrors, knowing that he would probably guess later. “Ever since Hybern.”

“Every night?”

She nodded. “I barely get very much sleep and because of it I can't eat very much. Cassian...” she hesitated, unsure if she should mention him. “he says that you guys care about me, and I would like to be eating more and sleeping more but I never can.”

“Have you tried taking tonics to help you sleep at night?”

“I've tried more things than I'd care to admit, but because of this annoying fae body everything I take is usually gone before it can work.” she had tried, tried everything from military grade to the black market, yet none had worked.

He sat back and seemed to consider it, those shadows at his shoulders seeming to move closer and start whispering into his ears. “I know of a way that should work. But you won't like it.”

“I'll do anything.”

“Sleep with Cassian.”

“Except that. What the fuck, Azriel?” she tried to remain calm under his suggestion but that proved more difficult than she had anticipated.

“Hear me out,” he said before she could demand an explanation. “You probably have the same recurring nightmare because you feel unsafe and vulnerable. Sleeping in the same bed as someone who makes you feel safe might ease you into a deeper sleep and the nightmares might stop.”

She breathed; in, out, in, out. “And what makes you think that he makes me feel safe?”

He raised an eyebrow. “He trains you every morning. That must mean that you know, even subconsciously, that he can be a protector in some way or another. Maybe just being near him will make you feel more... protected.”

She stood from the couch. “Well, I thank you for your time and less than helpful advice. Goodnight, Azriel.”

“Just consider it, Nesta. He isn't the only one who hears you scream at night.” he said before she closed the door behind her.

She scoffed to herself. Yeah, because Cassian made her feel protected.

~o0o~

The next two nights the nightmares still continued. Ones where Elain would be shoved down, some where she never emerged. Some where Nesta was dragged under, others where she managed to kill herself first. Thankfully those ones were very few and far between.

On the third night, she had had enough. She was tired of waking up in the middle of the night. She was tired of having to relive the worst moments of her life. She was tired of never eating because of it. She had reached the point of just saying 'fuck it' and dealing with the consequences later.

So she sat up from her bed, grabbed the stuffed bear that Elain had bought her weeks before as a joke, and stormed down the hallway to the room that seemed much closer than it ever had before.

She knocked once, and waited impatiently for the door to open and reveal a shirtless Cassian, hazel eyes still clouded with sleep. “Nesta?”

“Yes, can I come inside?” she said in a tone that came out as more snappish than she had meant it to be.

He wordlessly opened the door wider. She turned to him as he closed the door and folded his arms across his chest, unintentionally making the muscles in his arms and shoulders twitch and catch her eye.

“I need to sleep here.” she said in a rush.

He blinked. “You need to what?”

She rolled her eyes, but felt the flush on her cheeks. “Azriel told me that I might get rid of the nightmares if I sleep near someone who makes me feel less vulnerable.” she explained.

His eyes flickered down to the bear she held in her arms. It had black fur, large brown and green eyes and a red ribbon tied around its neck. She had unwittingly loved it the moment her sister had handed it to her.

“What's with the bear?”

She instinctively held it tighter. “I like having him around. And if you dare try hurt him, I will saw off your balls and stitch them to your forehead.”

He flinched back from that.

He gestured to his bed, sheets ruffled and pillows scattered from where he had been sleeping only minutes ago. “I'll sleep on the couch.”

She shook her head quickly. “No, I'm the one who came here uninvited. I'll take the couch.”

He had an argument forming on the tip of his tongue but he noticed the look in her eyes that said that she had already made up her decision and there was nothing he could do or say to sway her. He grabbed an extra blanket and a few pillows from his bed and laid them out on the couch for her.

~o0o~

Cassian slipped back into his still-warm bed, pulling the sheets up over his waist and turning his back on Nesta settling herself on his couch just opposite his bed.

He knew why she was here, even if she didn't know herself- or didn't accept it. Azriel hadn't been discrete while speaking to her the other night and had almost made sure that their words reached his ears. He just didn't expect her to show up at his door so soon. She was strong-willed, stubborn and never let those walls fall from around her.

She was so near, near enough to walk over and wrap his arms around her. He wanted to, Cauldron, he's never wanted anything else. But she would never let him touch her like that. He felt like he had already exhausted all his luck when he caught her in his wings and she had hugged him. He wasn't sure if she would want him to touch him back, so he had just hung his arms limply at his sides- until she boldly gave her consent. He still doesn't know how she didn't feel his heart beating faster than a war drum.

“Cassian?” she asked in a voice that was all too small for her usual attitude.

It took more than he'd like to admit to stop himself from running to her side. “Yes?”

“If I have another nightmare, please wake me up.” she whispered and he was afraid that he had actually just imagined it.

“Goodnight, Nesta.” he replied, still keeping his back to her as if that would stop him from cradling her and kissing those nightmares away. Fuck, this was going to be harder than he thought.

~o0o~

It was two hours later when she started whimpering in pain.

He hadn't gotten any sleep since she had settled on his couch, just listening to her breathing evening out in sleep had proved stronger than his need to rest.

It started out as her breathing coming out faster but he thought nothing of that, until it become stronger and she had started whimpering- gods, whimpering- in her sleep.

His sheets were thrown off in his rush to get to her side. She had kicked off her blanket and the teddy bear had been thrown to the ground. Sweat beaded her skin and soaked through the silk nightgown she wore. Her brows were furrowed in pain and her bottom lip quivering.

He knew what was happening, but he didn't know how to stop her. If I have another nightmare, please wake me up. She had said.

He grabbed onto her shoulders before he could stop himself. She thrashed against his grip and he quickly let her go. “Nesta,” he called softly, hoping to wake her with words only. “Wake up, sweetheart. It's just a bad dream. It can't hurt you. I promise.”

Slowly, slowly as he whispered words of calming and soothing, did her whimpers and tremors subside, and all that was left was her slowly opening her eyes to gaze at him. He stared back into those blue-grey eyes, hoping against hope that she wouldn't shout at him for being so near.

“You were having another nightmare.” he whispered in explanation. “I didn't know what else to do.”

She watched him, face guarded and emotionless, before a hand reached up from under her pillow to touch his cheek. He flinched away from it, thinking she was going to slap him, but her hand was soft and gentle, stroking his cheek in a way that made them red. Gods, he was blushing.

“Thank you,” she whispered. Her hand stopped its movement on his face and just rested there, soft as a dove's feather. “Can- can I stay?”

He didn't know what she meant by it- she was already sleeping in his room- but he nodded anyway, just to uncrease the worried lines between her eyes.

~o0o~

This nightmare was different, she could feel it from the moment she slipped into the dream-scape. This time there was no fast beating of her own heart in her chest, no breathlessness that came with the darkness surrounding her. She could only hear the sound of something whizzing through the air.

Then a tearing, followed by a howl of pain and loss and anguish. And then a bright light that blinded her. She blinked it away while the howling continued. As her eyes adjusted, all she could see was red.

Wings. His precious wings had been shredded to pieces.

And he was crying out in pain, so much pain.

She wanted to run to him, to tell him that they would heal and he would be okay. That the pain couldn't last.

She saw him slipping, the life slowly fading from his eyes as if someone had slowed down the hands of time.

But a voice was calling to her, deep and far away. She knew that voice. She knew its owner was still alive, still breathing and with her. The nightmare started fading into black as the voice brought her to conciousness. “Wake up, sweetheart. It's just a bad dream. It can't hurt you. I promise.” and she trusted him, trusted his words.

 

She opened her eyes to hazel staring back down at her, concern marring his handsome face. 

“You were having another nightmare.” he whispered in explanation, breath warm on her sweaty skin. “I didn't know what else to do.”

And her chest felt warm; warm and fuzzy like it did when she saw Elain enjoying herself. So in her half-asleep state, she barely registered that her hand was moving up until it had rested on his cheek. She felt him flinch, and her warm chest throbbed sadly at that. He had thought that she would hurt him.

She could feel how warm his face was under her hand. She whispered quietly, “Thank you,” because she didn't know what else to say. She knew he was about to pull away, knew that she should also be pulling away, but she wanted him to stay. Stay with her here as he could chase away her nightmares again and she could try soothe the pain of his wings from the dark circles under his eyes. “Can- can I stay?” she stuttered, hand stilling on his cheek.

He nodded quickly and the frown on her face disappeared. His eyes lit up at that.

~o0o~

He noticed the tremble in her bottom lip and the goosebumps prickling her skin, and he realised for the first time that her hand was cold on his face.

“You're cold.” he stated, hand moving to grip her wrist gently. She didn't even notice that he was touching her.

She raised a perfectly arched eyebrow but there was sleepy amusement in her eyes. “That's just my heart shining through.”

He followed her remark with a small chuckle. “That's just what you think your heart feels like. But I bet that down there somewhere it's a lot warmer.” he couldn't help himself, and pressed her hand harder to his cheek. He liked being touched by her, he realised.

“Cass,” she breathed and he shuddered at his name rolling off her tongue that way. She had never called him Cass before. Cassian, bastard, prick. Those are the things she called him. Never Cass. “I'm tired.”

His eyes softened. “I know, Nesta. I am too.”

She looked like she wanted to say something, but instead she settled with, “I should try get back to sleep now.”

He nodded, feeling, despite himself, disappointed. “So should I. Goodnight, sweetheart.” and that time he didn't say it just to get a rise out of her. That time he meant it.

~o0o~

Her heart was beating so fast, her palms sweaty.

She was just about to cross a line. A very big line that she wouldn't be able to take back ever again.

She laid on her side, facing away from his bed where he was facing away from her. She wouldn't be able to sleep now, not when he was just so close to her. Him and those hazel eyes, charming smile, dirty humour. 

She wanted to groan out. When had she started liking him? When had she started laughing at his jokes or wanting to return his smiles? When had she started to want to run her hands across his wings or braid his hair?

When did she start thinking that he would want her back?

When did she start wanting to cross a line and ask him to hold her?

~o0o~

They avoided each other the next day at breakfast. Nesta was put on edge every time he walked into the room and stiffened up when he sat across from her at the table. He didn't say anything, just started shovelling his own food onto his plate while she kept her head bowed, looking everywhere but at him. Her own plate was surprisingly full, her taking nibbles of her toast, eggs, bacon and had even included a fruit to the mix.

The others felt the tension- they weren't oblivious- and quickly filed out of the room to do some rather urgent and important thing that absolutely had to be done at that very moment.

Silence continued between them both, only broken by the sounds of them eating and the clink of utensils. Nesta wasn't focussing on her actions nor the delicious foods she was eating. She could only think of how tense she was and how beautiful Cassian looked in the daylight without a shirt. She shouldn't have noticed, but she did. And now that image of his glorious torso and arms would forever be stuck in her mind.

“When did you leave this morning?” he asked casually, sipping on orange juice.

As soon as the sun had streamed down on her face and she realised what had happened the night before. “Early,” was her reply, keeping her eyes downcast.

He took another large mouthful of egg and said nothing.

The silence continued.

~o0o~

Nesta didn't know why she thought that training would be any less tense than breakfast had been. But she turned out to be right, the tension between them gone as soon as they stepped outside.

They were brawling. Just a quick scuffle to loosen themselves up before the actual work began. He had her with an arm under her chin, bracing her against his front. She was trying to elbow him in the gut just like he had taught her days before, but every time she struck it was like banging her elbow against a brick wall. In a desperate move she had read from a book somewhere, she swung out with her leg and managed to hook it under his calf. They both went stumbling backwards onto the ground, Cassian not having braced himself for such a move.

Then she had turned and sat with her knees braced either side of his waist and her legs caught under his knees to keep his legs stilled. She had one hand pushed up against his throat, the other poised to punch his nose in.

He stared up at her from where he was under her, throat bobbing and eyes sparkling. “You caught me.” he beamed.

She shook her head, baring her teeth in a snarl. “You let me win, you bastard. I could never hope to pin you down like this.”

He smirked. “I wouldn't say never- maybe if you asked nice enough.” His loose hands touched her waist and she was suddenly aware of what kind of position they were in.

“In your dreams, Cass.”

He winked. “Every night.”

She wanted to feel disgusted, but the light banter was more of a relief than anything else. So she gave in to his invitation to play. She leaned down, hair falling down from over her shoulder to frame his own face. “Really? I expected you to be on top.” she breathed.

His breath hitched. “On top, behind, under. You wouldn't believe the things I can do.”

She leaned down impossibly closer, until she was just close enough to kiss, to finally taste her as he had wanted to for so long. “I rather like the idea of behind. I like someone who can take control.”

~o0o~

He was fucked. So uncomprehendingly fucked. She had him wrapped around those pretty little fingers and she didn't even realise it.

Her breath was hot on his face, and her body hotter pressed against his. He didn't know how she would act when he touched her waist but she seemed so totally at ease with the touch that he hadn't dared to move his hands higher or lower. “Can you do that, Cassian, take control?”

He had her under him faster than he thought possible himself. He had her wrists pinned above her head by one hand while the other remained at her waist. She had been right of course, when she said that he had let her win, but he had wanted just to feel something other than tension coming from her.

“Oh, sweetheart,” he cooed, getting as close to her face as he dared. “You have no idea how much control I can take from you.”

He stepped up and off her, putting distance between them before the temptation to kiss those soft lips became too hard to resist. She was breathing hard again, although he wasn't sure any more if that was because of their scuffle or because of him. “I need to go do some commander business. I'll see you at lunch.” he said, trying to make his walk as casual as possible with the tent in his pants.

~o0o~  
“You did what?” Elain exclaimed.

“Shhh, all I did was egg him on a little bit.” Nesta responded, thinking back to Cassian from earlier. “And I felt... you know.”

“So you were rolling around in the dirt and you managed to pin him but then he flips you over and pokes your thigh.” Elain went through again. Nesta nodded, a deep blush on her face. “Was it as impressive as his wingspan?”

“Elain!”

Her once innocent little sister had been spending too much time with the wrong crowds, Nesta decided.

“That doesn't answer my question.” Elain giggled.

Nesta's face had never felt as hot before in her entire life. “I don't know. I- I have nothing to really compare it too.”

Elain had never really laughed as loud as that before.

~o0o~

She slept in his room again that night. It wasn't really planned but she had deeply appreciated him waking her up the night before. So, once everyone else was retired for the night, Nesta knocked on his door and he wordlessly opened it for her and her stuffed bear.

She had tried going to the couch where she had spent the night before but found her way blocked by his arm. She looked up at him in annoyance but his eyes were stone. “You take the bed tonight.” he said in a voice that commanded hundreds. She couldn't ignore it.

She crawled onto his bed, large and fluffy, while he made it to the couch.

~o0o~

He watched her carefully through the night, listening closely to her breathing. When her breath hitched once, he was almost completely off the couch before he could process it. His eyes scanned her for any signs that she was having another nightmare but he found only the frown between her brows.

Her hair had come undone from the bun she had put it in hours ago and was now lying fanned out beneath her head like a halo of golden brown. Her bear had been tossed to the side a while ago and his bed sheets were tangled between her long legs. Her nightgown was simple, a large shirt over her from shoulder to mid thigh, but damn him if he didn't find her even more attractive.

She whimpered in her sleep, turning over so her back faced him. He stepped up and walked around his bed to watch her for any signs that it could get worse. Just when he thought that the nightmare might be becoming stronger and more powerful, she grabbed onto the pillow beneath her head, clutching onto it and pressing her face into the top of it. He heard her inhale and a deep throb broke out in his chest. That was his pillow, the one laced with his scent that had now taken out the lines between her brows.

Then he heard her. A soft, gentle sigh that he had never heard out of her lips. “Cass...” then another, just as soft and gentle as the first. “Cassian...”

His heart broke in two while he felt his legs loosing strength. She had said his name, while clutching onto his pillow, inhaling his scent and thinking of him as her anchor against the violent tides of her nightmare.

He watched on, pride and happiness flooding his chest with warm, fuzzy feelings. He reached down with one hand, grasping into the teddy bear she had earlier discarded in sleep. He looked it over, eyeing its button nose and dark colouring. Then his eyes fell onto the ribbon tied around its neck, the colour reminding him far too much of his red siphon. 

It was cute, he had to admit to himself, and now that Nesta had stolen his pillow (not that he minded in the least bit) it was only fair that he take something of hers to sleep with.

So Cassian settled back into his own couch, cuddling onto the black bear that smelt of Nesta, and fell asleep.

~o0o~

Nesta woke up to a missing bear.

She had nearly forgotten that Cassian had forced her to use his own bed the night before and it took a good few seconds before she realised where she was. When it finally clicked that she wasn't in any sort of danger, she clutched tightly onto the soft object in her arms and turned over to go back to a peaceful sleep.

But it smelt different, and her bear wasn't nearly as large as this was. She opened her eyes and peered down at the pillow in her arms with a frown. Where was her teddy?

She dropped the pillow on the bed next to her and threw off the blankets in search of her little furry companion. She checked under the covers, beside the pillows, under the bed, around on the floor, but it remained undetectable.

She frowned again, getting up from the insanely comfortable bed to look again. When her efforts again turned up fruitless, she turned to a slumbering Cassian with his back turned to her, fully intending to wake him and demand to know where her bear was.

She marched up to his side, adjusting the collar of the shirt she was wearing back over her shoulder. When she was looming over him, a hand stretched out to shake his shoulder, her wake up call died on her lips.

There, nestled under his chin and arm, securely locked tight against his bare chest, was her fuzzy bear. She glanced up at his face, so soft and gentle- not the usual hard lines or the witty remark on his tongue. He looked... peaceful. She couldn't wake him from that!

She reached over his sleeping form, managing to grab onto the bear's arm. She tried pulling it out from his grasp but it only seemed to tighten when she had pulled the bear out an inch. He grumbled something in his sleep, turning more over so she could barely even see her bear, nevermind trying to get it away from him. Her frown grew annoyed. How dare he steal her teddy bear!

It was only when she huffed and turned to go back to bed without her bear did she hear him. A soft chuckle, that slowly turned into a deep laugh as her anger grow with every breath he took. “You're awake, you bastard.” she hissed, looking around for anything she could maim him with. She could only find the pillow she had slept with and threw it at his smug, laughing face.

“I woke up with you kicking around on bed, making enough noise to wake Amren.” he said, taking the pillow to the back of his head before he turned on the couch to face her seething form.

“Maybe I wouldn't be making so much noise if you hadn't stolen my bear.” 

“I wouldn't need to steal you bear if you didn't steal my pillow.”

“Prick.”

“Nesta.”

“Bastard.”

“Nesta with the pretty face.”

She narrowed her eyes at his smirk. “You really want me to staple your balls to your armpits, don't you?”

“Keep talking like that, sweetheart, and I'll have to tickle the bad words from you.” his smirk grew as she unknowingly took a step back, away from his threat. He sat up, letting the bear fall to his lap. “Oh, look at that. Nesta Acheron is ticklish.”

“I sweat to whatever god that if you come within two metres of me, I will fling your favourite part across the ocean and onto Hybern's dinner table.”

He flung his head back and laughed. Laughed until there were tears forming at the corner of his eyes and Nesta looked so incredibly pissed off that he did, in fact, worry for his balls. Maybe he better be extra careful during their training that morning. “You're too cute when you're mad, Nesta Acheron.” He could see whatever threat was coming his way before he held out the bear for her and the retort died on her lips.

She swiped the bear from his hands, carefully looking it over as if he had somehow maimed it while he slept. She eyed him suspiciously, shooting daggers his way as she inched slowly away and finally out the door.

~o0o~

Cassian briefly considered what it was like to die.

He had been right in suspecting that he should have protected himself more during training. She had been lightning quick, her jabs at his sides and arms not very painful but a good distraction as she brought her knee up and hit him solidly in the groin.

He doubled over in pain as she danced away with a smirk on her face and satisfaction in her step. This wasn't even the first time she had kneed him in the balls but that didn't make it hurt any less.

He refused to speak to her for the rest of the day- but he ventured that that wasn't exactly a punishment for her.

~o0o~

They developed a working routine. Every morning she would wake at dawn and slip out his bed and he would wake only minutes after her. They had breakfast as a group and then Cassian and Nesta would go outside to train. Lunch would happen an hour after that and they ate that together. They usually went their separate ways after that, until dinner where they would argue about one thing or another and later retire to Cassian's bedroom for sleep.

They others never caught wind of her sleeping in his bed, or if they did they kept quiet about it. Azriel was the only one Nesta knew for sure that he knew, and his occasional glances reminded her of that fact.

It was on a particularly cold night that Nesta decided to change up the routine slightly. As much as she loathed to admit it, she had grown steadily comfortable in Cassian's presence. Maybe that's why one particularly cold night she gripped onto his arm before he could walk away from the bedside. “I'm cold.”

He eyed the mountain of blankets over her. “Can you even breathe under all that?”

She frowned and sighed dramatically. “That's when you're supposed to offer to sleep next to me, you idiot.” her nicknames for him had long since lost any bite to them and now he could say they were out of affection than harm.

He raised an eyebrow, sweeping the hair away from his face and behind an ear. “Do you want me to?”

She sighed again and rolled her eyes. “You're going to make me say it, aren't you?”

He grinned.

“Fine. I can't stand watching you sleep on that cramped couch for one more night while I'm over here with all this wing space and no wings. Plus, I can't breathe under all this but I'm still cold.”

He drew in a breath, trying to settle his wildly beating heart and nodded. He pulled up an edge of the blankets. “Are you sure about this?” he asked carefully. The last he heard of two platonic people sleeping next to one another was Rhysand and Feyre. And that did not end platonic. Would she even let him do that to her? He ended that thought before it become stronger.

“I wouldn't ask you if I didn't want it.” she said, shoving another pillow to the other side of where she lay, as far away as possible.

He wanted to tease her, just a little bit, but he knew that asking him probably took more nerves than she had ever needed to use. It was strangely... vulnerable almost. And looking down at the bed he hadn't used in weeks caused his stiff neck and back to groan in relief. So he lifted the mountain of thick blankets- shit, they were much heavier than he thought- and slipped underneath them all, facing Nesta's back. He stayed on the edge of the bed, giving her all the space she needed, with his wings hanging off the edge.

Minutes in and he heard her breathing calm and knew that she had fallen asleep. She had seemed tired all day, whether it was from training that morning or just general sleepiness he didn't know. He watched the slow rise and fall of her shoulders, the way her back was totally relaxed and free of stress, the fallen locks of hair that spread beneath her.

He realised, with a start, that he was in such deep shit.

~o0o~

She didn't want to explain that the nightmares were coming back.

They were never truly gone, always tugging at her dreamscape and sometimes hitting once again in full force. But they had stopped scaring her, stopped making her sob and bring up her dinner. And she knew why of course, she wasn't that daft. Azriel had been right, oh so very right, that Cassian would help her.

Yet they still returned. Last night had been the first night in many that she had woken up covered in sweat once this begun. She had almost woken him up too, but thankfully it wasn't bad enough to cut through his sleep. After experiencing waking up breathless and terrified for the first time in a while had really given her the sense that she wouldn't- couldn't- live like that again. The only solution she could think of to her problem had been to bring the person previously starving off her nightmares closer.

And she hadn't been lying when she said that she couldn't stand watching him sleep on that couch again. Her own experience had found it stiff and uncomfortable yet not once did he complain, not once say anything about the obviously stiff muscles and the lack of room he required with his wings.

As soon as she felt the bed dip with his weight, her chest felt lighter. She calmed her breathing, slowing it down enough so that it mimicked sleep. She had a sneaking suspicion that he would leave as soon as she fell asleep, and that defeated the purpose of having him here in the first place.

She could feel his eyes on her, not in the way she had usually felt from males, but a slow, thoughtful watch that had her relaxing. She knew that he wouldn't let anything hurt her any more. Even though now she could defend herself in both wit and brawns. He was a protector, and she had never had someone protect her like he did. Sure, Feyre had cared for them for the years when they were poor and mortal but that had been survival, not protection.

Then she heard his breath hitch slightly and a hand was at the tips of her hair, gently toiling them through his fingers. His hand slowly moved higher, fingers dancing through her tangles and tresses, until he reached the root and gently began massaging her scalp.

She was in heaven. There was nothing in the world she enjoyed more than someone playing with her hair, and she supposed that with his own hair he knew exactly how to bend it to bring the most pleasure to her head.

She wanted to tilt into his movements, to moan and groan at his touches, but she was supposed to be asleep. Then her mind started catching up to her and she almost wanted to pull away and ask him. Why was he touching her? He almost never did unless it was during training. He never put a hand on her arm or let a wing brush against her. He had always confined himself to keep his hands away, but now in the safety of the darkness of night he was reaching out to play with her hair. 

It was... cute, Nesta supposed. Slightly creepy but cute nevertheless.

And she heard his breath stutter and his grow limp and she knew that for once it was he who had fallen asleep first.

~o0o~

She discovered that he took up a surprising amount of space in his sleep. She had assumed that since he never really fell off his couch in sleep that he barely moved around and stayed in more or less the same place throughout the night.

Oh by the Cauldron she was wrong.

His godsdamned wings took up most of the space, not actually him but that didn't make her predicament any better. She was lying close to the edge of her side of the bed, him pressing in on her space and breathing heavily in his sleep onto her neck. He was sleeping belly-down, which gave his wings all the space they wanted- which meant stretched out above her, the claw at the tip of his wing hooked onto the bedpost. Thankfully that meant that his wing wasn't actually on her as it was above her.

She knew it was dawn now, could hear the first bird calls outside, but because of his stupid wing she was trapped here under it instead of leaving like she usually did.

She was quickly growing restless, had traced the veins in the membrane of his wings to keep her eyes occupied while she thought of another way to do her morning escape before he woke up. She reached out with a hand to touch the wing barring her way, since she wouldn't get the chance to do so when they both were awake.

His reaction surprised her. Her fingers lightly run down the thin membrane and he released a heavy sigh and a shiver. She frowned, her curiosity peaking, and did it again. She got the same breathless reaction from him. She turned to look at his face and found him still fast asleep, a crease between his brows. This time she ran her entire hand down the span of his wing and an arm shot out to pull her to his side. She smothered the squeak of surprise before it could woke him. He had pulled her up against his chest, head nestled in the crook of her neck as he sighed again.

It was then that she felt him, hot and heavy against the back of her thigh. Her own breathing hitched at that. She considered waking him and ending this quickly but something stopped her. Like a hand had reached out to silence her and stir up those annoying warm fuzzy feelings in her chest and stomach.

Then she heard his breathless sigh against her hair and her heart stopped. “Nesta...” His wing curled tighter around them both, reminding her of the time weeks earlier when he had cocooned her against him.

She didn't dare move or speak, especially when she felt him go stiff behind her and knew that he had just woken up. His wing almost immediately snapped up and he jerked himself away from her. She turned to look at him and found that his face was redder than the ribbon around her bear's neck. “Shit, I'm so sorry,” he said quickly. Then his attention got diverted further south and he desperately grabbed at a pillow to cover himself up. “Fuck, Nesta-”

She cut off whatever he was going to say with a giggle, which quickly turned into a full-blown laugh. His face somehow got even more red and she laughed harder. Laughed like she hadn't in- gods, years. Her cheeks ached in mirth and her stomach growled angrily in pain.

~o0o~

He had never heard her laugh.

He had never known if she ever did let herself laugh.

But here she was, sitting in his bed while he tried in vain to come up with a good excuse to the ache in his loins and to why he was spooning her like a lover.

And Cassian realised that, although the shit pile he was in was deep and probably endless, he wouldn't want to ever take back the butterflies and sunshine in his chest.


	2. Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a year since I posted the first part of this fic and I decided to revisit it for a short follow up because it's been a whole year and I'm still not over this fic. So this is for my loyal fans and fic-lovers that have endured many feels with me.

Cassian considered himself strong, both physically and emotionally. He had trained for centuries to hone his body into the way it was now, and centuries to steel his heart against the things that every soldier must become accustomed to- death, blood, injury, defeat. He prided himself in the fact that those barely fazed him anymore. He could confidently walk onto a battlefield and survive anything thrown his way.

But Cauldron boil him, he had a weakness that put a flaw in his perfectly strong demeanour. And it came in the form of Nesta Archeron.

Hair a golden brown that caught the sunlight and moonlight alike. Eyes of steely grey that felt as if they could just bore a hole right through your mind. Lips pursed in silent judgement, intense scrutiny. She had the kind of presence that would silence any room, put a stop to any conversation. She walked like the earth beneath her feet should be grateful, chin held high, back rigid straight, eyes trained to meet those of anyone brave enough. She was her own brand of tough and strong, and there was nothing Cassian could think of that would not fear her if her fury was trained on them.

The best part- or the worst part- of Cassian’s weakness was that _he_ was _her_ weakness too. And she had cradled herself against his body in the middle of the night.

Her head nestled between his shoulder and neck, her arms slung around his shoulders, her breasts pushed against his chest, her legs locked and entangled between his. She had moulded her body to fit against his, soft against hard, gentle against rough.

Cassian didn’t know how to react. Had she been any other woman, and she didn’t have a hold around his heart, he would have responded in kind and slotted his hips into hers to enjoy later on when they were both awake. But she wasn’t any other woman, and there was no part of her that would concede to enjoying _that_ later on. Or perhaps there was,- if he remembered the way her eyes had followed the trail a bead of sweat had made when he was training shirtless- but Cassian agreed that neither of them would be ready for that until they sorted out whatever _the thing_ was between them.

Mor had called it that: _the thing_. Like it was some sort of tangible barrier put in place between them that stopped any confessions from being spoken and potentially messing up the way things were already. Rhys had laughed at that, and laughed harder when Cassian had rolled his eyes. _There is no thing_ , he had said, ignoring the way tears formed in the corners of his brother’s eyes. _Nesta and I are perfectly fine._

And they were perfectly fine. They kept each other’s night terrors away, like promised, and that was as far as things between them went.

But Cassian knew he was lying, even if he would do nothing to make it true. Nesta made his heart thunder the same way it did when he saw the females take flight for the first time, or when younglings smiled at him after he had given them rest. Her touch alighted his skin- not in heat, as he knew sexual intent to imply, but the same way a salt bath would relax his muscles after weeks of tension. Nesta made him feel _loved_ , even if those words would not be said by either of their lips.

So, Cassian was in a trap. He wanted dearly to return Nesta’s full-body cuddling, but he knew that if he did, she would wake up and immediately want to leave him and his bed. But if he pushed her away, she would grow cold and distant- physically- and he also didn’t want that. No matter what plan he resorted to, it would not end the way he wanted.

His mind was made for him, however, when she yawned sleepily and Cassian knew she had woken up. His thoughts ran rampant trying to think of excuses as to why they were so close, why he had not returned her hands to herself and why he had not broken away from her first. But his thoughts were silenced when, instead of pulling herself away and fleeing from the room, Nesta only groaned at the new sunlight hitting her eyes and buried her head deeper into his neck.

“Nesta?” Cassian whispered, afraid that she thought she was just dreaming.

“Too early for talk.” She mumbled, words half obscured by his neck.

“It’s already morning, Nes.” He chuckled.

Her arms moved upwards until she had them wrapped around his neck. “If you want to kick me out, do so. But until then, I’m comfortable.”

It was tempting, more so than anything else she had ever said. And she was warm pressed against, his wings and the blankets enough to keep in all heat between them against the cold winter outside. He glanced down at her, but her face was hidden. So, with only a few seconds of hesitation on his part, his arms returned her embrace and came to circle around her waist. In response, she curled tighter to him.

Yes, most definitely _the thing_ between them. It existed. And with every second Cassian spent with her breathing hot breaths against his throat and his hands resting against her shoulder blades, he could feel it growing, swelling, expanding in his chest to encompass his finger tips and toes, never to stop even beyond his own body.

Cassian couldn’t find it in himself to care about it anymore. He had the woman he had always dreamed of in his arms, and he would gladly let _the thing_ between them grow if it meant he could stay like this longer.

“Could we skip training today?” Nesta asked.

“Why would we do that?”

“Cass, it’s snowing.” She pointed out.

He looked out the window. Indeed, it had began snowing again at some point. But he could feel that that was not her only reason. They had trained in the snow many times before.

“You drank too much wine last night, didn’t you?” he asked with a small laugh. He could smell it on her breath now that he had realised it. Last night had been Feyre’s birthday, and he’s seen Nesta with more than one goblet of wine in her hands over the course of the night.

She had looked ravishing. A gown that started at a black but faded towards white at the bottom. A neckline that choked at her throat but left her shoulders and back bare. Cassian had wondered more than once last night how it would feel to trail kisses down the line of her spine that the dress left uncovered. He himself had been dressed in a dark shirt he only buttoned high enough that it would not flap open and breeches that he was sure was modelled for Rhys rather than him, but he had caught Nesta peeking at the tattoos on his chest when she thought he wouldn’t notice, so perhaps the shirt wasn’t as bad a call as he first thought.

“I only had three.” She answered.

“So it wouldn’t bother you if I opened the curtains wider?” He smirked, already knowing the way her mouth would tighten at such a thought.

“I am not hungover, if that’s what you’re implying.”

“Actually, I was implying that you would kill me if I got up and let all the warm air out.”

Her fingers that had entwined behind his neck tightened in his hair until he felt claws pricking at his scalp. “If you value your wings, you won’t do that.”

He did in fact value his wings, quite a lot actually, but teasing Nesta was almost as valuable to him. “Not threatening my balls today, Nes?”

“I figured keeping your hands to yourself is enough torture to them. After all, I am outstandingly beautiful.”

He growled, but it was laced with amusement. The next moment found her under him with his hands pinning her hands next to her head and his wings falling next to them to block out the sun and the outside world from them and their eyes locked on one another. Hers were still rimmed in sleep, but still sharp and still just as strong as they had always been. And he was so immersed in her eyes that he did not noticed that she had hooked her thighs over his hips until her foot brushed against the back of his calf.

“Modest, aren’t we?” he asked in a growl. It would be so easy to snap his hips down and let her feel exactly what her beauty did to him, but he resisted. Because he knew it wouldn’t end up how his best fantasies imagined it would- with her stripping herself in the gown from last night and grasping onto his wings in a pleasured frenzy.

She didn’t smile outright, but her eyes sparkled. “I’m not hungover,” she said again, and for a brief moment he thought he was her eyes flicker down to his lips. “But if I were, would you stay with me and skip training for a day?”

He swallowed, because he knew exactly what his answer was. Yes, undeniably, irrevocably, explicitly _yes_. She saw it in his eyes and the way that his shoulders fell loose and his grip on her wrists grew slack. She allowed herself a moment of smugness at her small victory.

“If this is your way of asking for cuddles-“ He started, a smirk playing on his lips.

“It is.” She stated.

He was surprised for a moment, but he let it pass as he settled back down and she shaped herself against him yet again. But this time he was prepared for when her every curve hugged against him and it felt as though his heart would break through his rib cage.

Just when he thought she had gone back to sleep and he thought his heart had calmed enough for him to do the same, her voice muttered out, “Just one more thing.” He hummed his question to her and pulled her closer to him. He had just fluttered his eyes closed when he felt her, leaning up to press a butterfly light kiss to the tip of his nose.

The action had his eyes jerk open but she had already burrowed herself into his neck and to face her would require pulling away from her warmth and her embrace, and Cassian wouldn’t risk that possibility.

“Thank you,” she mumbled, and they were both lost to sleep a little while later.

 

~o0o~

 

It had become a game of sorts among the inner circle to next guess when Nesta and Cassian would surprise them with another small burst of affection. Elain was the leading winner of their game, and definitely the most supportive of her sister when she noticed their hands touching on the breakfast table or their training outside interrupted by a sudden need to speak to one another.

But it was one thing to guess that they would stare at each other for several moments longer than necessary and quite another to be stunned when neither emerged for breakfast that morning and remained locked up in their room.

“Do you think they’ve finally acknowledged the bond?” Mor said casually, smearing butter on her roll.

Elain shook her head, frowning. “I don’t think they’ve even _kissed_.” She considered it a moment. “Do you think we should check on them?”

“And risk Nesta getting mad?” Feyre scoffed. “Have fun with that.”

“Az,” Mor said, elbowing him as he reached for a fruit across the table. “Use your shadowy things and check on them.”

“And risk Cassian getting mad?” He scoffed in an imitation of Feyre.

“Fine,” Mor said, slamming her hands on the table. “I’ll go check on them.”

And she did, although it wasn’t to see them bathing in afterglow or still very much busy as Mor had suspected. Instead, when she cracked open the door and peeked inside, she found both of them still deeply asleep, neither naked nor showing signs of after hours activities. She was disappointed, yet also relieved that she didn’t see their bare arses.

When she reported her findings to everyone else over the breakfast table, it met with sighs and coins exchanging hands. Surprisingly, it was Az that came up with the most money.

 

~o0o~

 

When Nesta finally forced herself up hours later, it came with grumbles and groans from Cassian and her own body protesting when she emerged from their warm haven. But no matter how much she loved being held by Cassian and sleeping the day away, she was _starving_.

She returned to the bed minutes later with a tray in hands heaped with leftovers from breakfast. She plopped it down on top of the sheets and climbed under the covers again. When she was significantly warmer again, she brought it closer to her and Cassian.

He raised a brow at her. “Breakfast in bed? Really?”

She grabbed at a slice of toast. “If you want to complain, I suggest finding your own food.”

And the rest of the day, up until the next morning, was spent in bed. Hours spent talking and taking naps, braiding each other’s hair and teasing until it became almost unbearable. Both Nesta and Cassian conceded that perhaps skipping a day here and then really wasn’t too bad a plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ending was rushed, I apologise, but I just wanted to get something out an the anniversary of part 1.


End file.
